Friday, November 18, 2011
Preemie Life - Day 21
You know my daughter will be three weeks old tomorrow. It seems like it just happened and it also seems like it has been forever. Sometimes I feel like I'm in a dream state, like is this my real life? I went to my mops group today and one of the ladies had me cornered by the pie. "You're the one who had her baby early right," she asked. "Yup, that's me," I said. "Oh, well when is she coming home?" I had to laugh. I'd told Jamie if I got asked when she was coming home or if it was hard I was just going to scream. I guess that's what I get for deciding I wanted a piece of pie. Such a weird life I live. I feel this desire to be normal, to return to the status quo, but then sometimes it hits me, the status quo has changed. I've changed. My life has been forever altered. My daughter will come home, she will join our family but I'll always have this bit of me that is changed. For example this....once upon a time I cooked meals, I was an awesome homemaker, I baked from scratch, I avoided sugar, white flour, non organics. There are lots of lessons I've learned with this experience, but one of the silliest although that doesn't make it any less true is this, Lucky Charms really are Magical. I don't know if I'll ever be able to live again without having a box in the cupboard.